One Year

As of today we've been in New Zealand one whole year. Funny how in some ways it still kinda feels like we just got here. But yesterday Ali’s niece, Apameh, arrived from Germany, and showing around a newcomer is a great way to feel like an old hand. However, I won’t be able to play tour guide for a while: over the next few weeks I’ve got two research papers due, plus an exam to study for, and three lectures to prepare. So, I’ve got to get back to work, but here are some news stories that caught my attention this week:

FEARS GROW OVER ROCK SNOT SPREAD
An invasive algae, known as rock snot, has been confirmed in another South Island river, worsening fears it will spread out of control.

NUDE NEW ZEALAND MP TAKES STROLL
New Zealand politician Keith Locke, a Green Party MP, vowed before the election to walk naked down Broadway – a major shopping avenue - if Rodney Hide won the Epsom seat. Hide wasn’t polling well at the time, but Green’s "have integrity - we keep our promises," said Mr. Locke. (There’s a great picture of Mr. Locke in his expertly painted business attire on the BBC’s website.)

NEW LOUISIANA PURCHASE
SEPTEMBER 16, 2005, BATON ROUGE, LA (AP) - The White House announced today that President Bush has successfully sold the state of Louisiana back to the French at more than double its original selling price of $11,250,000.

"This is a bold step forward for America," said Bush. "And America will be stronger and better as a result. I stand here today in unity with French Prime Minister Jack Sharaq, who was so kind to accept my offer of Louisiana in exchange for 25 million dollars cash."

The state, ravaged by Hurricane Katrina, will cost hundreds of billions of dollars to rebuild.

"Jack understands full well that this one's a 'fixer upper,'" said Bush. "He and the French people are quite prepared to pump out all that water and make Louisiana a decent place to live again. And they've got a lot of work to do. But Jack's assured me, if it's not right, they're going to fix it."

The move has been met with incredulity from the beleaguered residents of Louisiana.

"Shuba-pie!" said New Orleans resident Willis Babineaux. "Frafer-perly yum kom drabby sham!"

However, President Bush's decision has been widely lauded by Republicans.

"This is an unexpected but brilliant move by the President," said Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist. "Instead of spending billions and billions, and billions of dollars rebuilding the state of Louisiana, we've just made 25 million dollars in pure profit."

"This is indeed a smart move," commented Fox News analyst Brit Hume. "Not only have we stopped the flooding in our own budget, we've made money on the deal. Plus, when the god-awful French are done fixing it up, we can easily invade and take it back again."

The money gained from 'The Louisiana Refund' is expected to be immediately pumped into the rebuilding of Iraq.

(Ok, that last one might not have been strictly true.)

Cheers,
Sandie